Exhausted

"How did you do it?" I innocently asked the mom with the 3 year old, 18 month old and one on the way. "How did you get them potty trained?"

"It was easy," she replied. "I had my daughter trained at 12 months, she has never had an accident and I did it all in 3 hours."

"What???," I said--needing desperately the secret.

"It's all in the book--you should check it out--really any child can be potty trained in a day," she said as easy as you please.

That is how it happened that this robber of sleep, book of hope and fear came into my possession.

I have been reading this granter of one day miracles since last July. I have attempted it lock stock and barrel twice on my own--to no avail and many wet floors and baby lax later. The book knows this will happen--that is why it tells you that if the primary caregiver "fails" at this task then the task needs to be given to someone else to do. All of that led to today. My mother said that she would give it a shot, along with my cousin’s help.

Being a true Baptist, I believe in miracles--especially the everyday variety. So while my mother and cousin were abiding by this book's rules--disregarding phone calls, not answering the door, speaking only to my child and only about the potty, I was trying to play catch up with my work. I put 100 miles on my car, updated listings, took new pictures, put up signs, crawled around in barns, climbed fences, avoided wildlife and measured houses. I was midway through when I got the call.

"Someone has something they want to tell you."

"I pee peeed in the potty Mommy!"

"Great!" I said, believing that miracles really do come true.

Of course I avoided the Pollyanna tendencies of my mother who then filled in a few blanks about how the tinkling began and how it ended. My baby was trained! It was done--or so I believed.

Now here is the problem the book doesn't address. What if you have a fairly bright child, who understands completely how to hold back and in fact how to let go--but who sees letting go as failure on her part. Even if the letting go happens on the potty and even if she is rewarded handsomely. It is still failure and in her little mind it must not occur.

That is where we are now...10 hours post pee a million miles to go and no end in sight. My child is clean and dry but she going to explode! I have begged, modeled behavior, and forced fluids all to no avail. According to this little girl in the fancy shoes, pee is her glass slipper and she ain't leaving it behind!